This is a section about encouragement based on personal thoughts and experiences. Follow my lead.
We all need to be encouraged when times are uncertain. Through my blog and YouTube videos, I make efforts to try to encourage others. Part of my motivation to encourage others is that there is too much negative in this world. There are too many things that bring us to depression and overall feelings of hopelessness and worthlessness. A lot of people say I'm too nice to them. Well, part of my reasons why I am this way is because I want to work for positive change for others. Take it from someone whom has been depressed before- there is the quote that misery loves company. If someone is down on their luck, they want peers to also be down on their luck just to feel better and to know that it isn't just those persons whom are down.
My life isn't perfect. I've never been around only positive people. I've had days where I feel strong and confident... then days where I feel weak and incompetent. I have felt like a strong human being, and then I have felt like I'm the most pathetic thing given life to. Feeling my own transgressions, the only way I feel to keep myself happy is to make others happy... which in turn will make me feel better in the long run. That is the way I operate. Take my own work for example blogging or making videos or whatever. I've seen people gain much more popularity and attention than my own blogging work. There was a time I amassed 4.2K views for a video in two days, and my video didn't even crack the most popular videos for a certain period. Just because I offer some things for sale online doesn't mean I have gotten the level of success I COULD be getting. I never spent any money to try to draw people to my Facebook fan page, and I feel I could get more people to be fans of mine.
From blogging, to YouTube, to music, and more... encouragement is always something appreciated. People and things I believe in need votes of confidence for when times are low. Life is better when you feel like people actually care and when you have loving support from others. Sometimes, all the support we try to generate within could benefit from gaining extra support. It is just a terrible feeling when you commit to something but not feel you can be as successful as others. You feel like you are wasting your life. And when you feel like you are wasting your life, you back yourself into a corner you feel you will never get out of.
If I have depressed you so far, then let me tell you that I am ready to try to offer some positively powerful thoughts to help draw out the negative vibes. I am ready to discuss the powerful nature of encouragement.
Now that I've given you my own sob stories, let's talk about actually making people feel important rather than put them down like garbage.
The Science of Encouragement.Let's look at what encouragement does and entails. Most of you know I live on inspiration. So is there an example where encouragement really means something and influenced this blog post? Sure!
One example that pops into my mind was when I complimented someone who did a so-so job modeling a 3D scene he/she offered for sale on TurboSquid. I was honest in saying the person did a very good job, but could do a whole lot better. I told this person to improve his/her skills. Someone more critical than I basically ripped this 3D modeler apart. This one person who critically critiqued this 3D modeler even said I was basically too kind. He even went to the level of saying I was giving this modeler "a false sense of confidence" or something like that. And I mean, do you suggest I trash this person like he/she did an injustice? Like this person brought down the integrity of this community? I know I've offered my own material on TurboSquid, but I feel bad myself that I am somehow seen on the same level of low-level talent that somehow won't amount to anything despite the fact I am trying to improve my own 3D skills.
Here are two schools of thought. If I did decide to trash this so-so modeling effort, I would run the risk of making this person feel like he/she will never amount to anything. This person may decide to give up entirely on making 3D models despite the person's willingness to make and sell 3D models. The person may not ever want to release anything ever again because he/she feels unfit for a certain community or society. I chose to commend the person because (1) I am an amateur myself with 3D, and (2) I would rather someone improve and feel capable of greatness rather than pin down someone like they will never amount to anything special. It surely hurts feeling like you won't amount to anything. A feeling like this is as if society has failed on you and that you seem unfit and incapable of any level of success. People can change and improve, but without encouragement, even the best efforts tend to lead to a lost cause. This is as inconsistent as inconsistent can be.
NOTE: It is possible I may do a related blog post on this topic. Stay tuned to this blog if I do decide to make a similar post based on this section.
The Impacts of Encouragement.Here is a classic example of encouragement. I will use the example of a beautiful young lady, somewhere between the ages of 18-25 in a major city or in college. Let's pretend she runs a fashion blog and shares some of her outfits online. Let's say one day she posts an outfit she thinks looks amazing and feels amazing... but most of the general public disagrees. Posting such an outfit and getting such negative feedback causes her to question whether she should continue posting blog posts and outfits of her looks. Would you encourage or discourage her? This is what would happen if discouraged or encouraged:
If she is discouraged, she may give up entirely on fashion blogging or maybe even take that one outfit off of her sites. It is also possible she may hate herself because nobody has given her any vote of confidence for her choice of fashion. She may also feel she is ugly and develop thoughts of low self-esteem. It is also possible this fashion blogger could change up her style to be better accepted among others.
Or imagine someone offers kind words despite the hate she's gotten. The lady realizes she can't please everyone, but at least it feels refreshing someone offers words of kindness and various compliments. Depending on the level of encouragement and the words offered, someone could seriously convince the downed person he/she is better than the hate being given to the individual. The power of one positive reaction could be enough to drive away the power of negative reactions. Someone who has positive vibes and support works better and is more confident in one's work.
Someone who commits to doing something should be able to have some level of success he/she aspires to. People do things looking to reach a certain level of success or recognition. Not being able to offer that kind of recognition leaves most people to disappointment. People may often times improve their skill in their craft. If someone is not given the level of love and encouragement, it plays a limiting factor to how great someone can actually be. Everyone deserves to be at their greatest. If the hypothetical fashion blogger in this example lacked encouragement from others, she would have quit a long time ago because she know she will never amount to whatever level of success she could achieve. Meanwhile, other people would have greater levels of success while she gets pushed aside and feel like garbage. Even if you don't entirely care about competing in some specific field, at least you should feel you are at least moderately qualified and entitled to the same level of success most others are accustomed to. Life seems unfair when you can't be as successful as others.
Encouragement: A Working Example.There was a time when I E-Mailed various fashion bloggers I follow by sharing kind thoughts. One blogger I E-Mailed mentioned how not many people liked some of her fashion choices, but after I offered my own thoughts and considered positive thoughts and constructive criticism, she noted she was more confident in putting together outfits. My encouragement has helped her to feel more confident and more able to keep posting outfits. I am sincere in my comments and actions. I don't like being just another talking head or some anonymous figure. I am honest and real even if my thoughts go against the grain and opposite of the mainstream.
Encouragement: Why Bother?I tend to think too much about other people and of other people. Despite this, I feel people have things they enjoy and have fun with. I can see when people try their best and enjoy what they do. Rather than hate on others, I want the best for others. That is even if you hate me and everything I stand for. I honestly wish some haters wouldn't be so critical of me, but I'd rather people enjoy success rather than be down on their luck.
Encouragement: What Can You Do?Something you can do is wish someone well in future endeavors and improve their skill in a certain arena if you feel one can be better. Unless someone commits a despicable crime or something, it feels better knowing someone sincere offers his/her well wishes and hope for greatness. It feels better when people feel they can make their own special impacts or become successful in some respect. People put their lives and their hearts into their work and enjoy what they do. Unless someone does a completely horrible job, people want to feel like they can provide amazing material rather than feel like being a waste of time and energy.
When I tell people they are capable of anything or are great-looking or talented, it is because I believe in someone and want someone to be successful. I have been in situations where nobody believed in me, and I ended up amounting to much less than what I am capable of. I don't want that for other people. I don't want to feel as if I am something replaceable or can be flushed down the toilet. Sadly, some people don't want to give some things a chance. I guess some people feel those who are incapable of great success are destined to fail.
Coming up next are some final thoughts of mine in regards to encouragement.
Encouragement: Final Thoughts
When people feel down and don't have much support from others, people doubt themselves and their abilities. Gaining positive reactions and encouragement help people feel respected for their work. People can be down on their luck, but they don't have to stay down on their luck. People who don't feel encouraged end up never becoming the best they can be. They may never be able to improve. People may never be able to enhance and refine their craft. If you are happy with keeping certain people down, that's your call. It at least feels good knowing there are people who care about others rather than feel like nobody loves them. It pays to encourage others to be better rather than let people feel they have a cap on being successful.
Encouragement is the combination of someone knowing they can be better along with actually working to be better. It can help someone continue doing something and loving something rather than completely abandon it and never reach the level of potential success one can be entitled to. Teachers and mentors who try to groom people to be better use encouragement because they feel their pupils can benefit in ways that make them better in life and in other things. Having people believe they can do anything is enough to help people reach levels of success they aspire to. People have to believe they can be capable of anything, other people looking to make others better try to offer encouragement to help them move closer towards success, and the end result when all works well leads to success. This is the kind of chemistry that helps people enjoy life more and feel capable of anything.
Everyone deserves the opportunity to be successful in what anyone puts their heart and soul into. If people don't feel they can amount to greatness, people will never be great. Work with people who maybe need a boost in encouragement. Why should people be limited in success no matter how hard they work to be their own superstar? The methods of reaching total success vary for others, but everyone has a chance to be great. Why limit this potential others have? It is even a double standard to look at people in the sense that they compete in the same field and do the same things to be relevant, while someone is vastly more successful than someone else. If one person can be great, why can't others amount to the same level of success? So it pays to encourage people to be better rather than look at some people like they are destined to failure and entitled to failure.
People I believe in get my full encouragement and love. I want this world to be a better place rather than wish disappointment and futility to others. It isn't being "too nice" to others; it's about wishing people be better and reach their full potential- even if people don't realize how much potential they have. Encourage someone to be better. People may even thank you in the future for believing in them. That, in turn, will make you feel better and stronger as a person.
I honestly sometimes hate bringing up saddening thoughts. However, I have to bring these things up because life is unfair, and people love doing anything possible to bring people further and further down rather than keep them up and uplift their spirits. This world would be a much better place if we actually try to give people reason to live rather than happily anticipate their death. So if people are going to keep spewing hate and dislike, I guess I'll carry the load trying to offer things to be happy and positive about. At least I am someone who is trying to offer something opposite of the usual hate and gloom social media and blogging usually serves up.
If you feel my efforts are very much appreciated and welcome, thank you. Feel free to follow my work in any capacity. I hope you enjoyed this post and hope it has enlightened you in some sort of manner. Thank you for reading! Take care and be well.
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