"...girl, you're amazing just the way you are."Despite this lovely part of the chorus of "Just the Way You Are" by Bruno Mars, many females feel under extreme pressure to be and remain beautiful. What most people fail to realize, though, is that everyone is beautiful in their own way. Every girl (and I use this loosely) seems like they have to be Barbie doll perfect- tall, sexy, slender, charming, fashionable, and most of all... beautiful. That is what can happen when you rely too much on ideals- you disregard reality. Ideal society says that every beautiful woman is between the ages of 18 and 25 and are both immensely sexy and alluring. Reality, however, says that not every woman is slim and slender and super-sexy. Some girls even hate fashion or don't consider themselves fashionable. Some don't even care if they are beautiful or not.
-Bruno Mars
When you're feeling ugly, always remember:
^ from: (hover for picture credit or click to visit the site I got this picture from) - Feeling ugly? Remember- you're beautiful!
--- Inspiration(s) for This Blog Post ---
Some of my blog posts have been popular to where I've earned the respect of a certain group of individuals. Two of my most popular blog posts are my "Plus Size Fashion" and "Sweet Petite!" blog posts. I can say that I've earned some kind of respect from readers for both posts. I never thought my "Plus Size Fashion" post would garner respect from curvy ladies as well as in meeting new friends on Facebook. I never thought my "Sweet Petite!" blog post would get some love from petite women.Besides focusing on fashion, I created those two posts to try to meet new people and try to offer some respect. There are not as many options to cater to plus size women or petite women. Most fashion designers and stores mostly cater to average-type women. Because there are not as many options for plus size or petite women, these two departments of fashion are basically their own industries. There are even blogs and websites highlighting on these two departments of fashion.
One of my TRUE inspirations for this blog post, however, was when I read a post called "You are Beautiful!" on Principessa Gabriella. Gabriella talks about how she's disgusted when girls who lack confidence on their looks complain online about their image. Gabriella, as a voice of reason, convinces ladies to be more confident in their looks. To get Gabriella's perspective, check out: "You are Beautiful!" on Principessa Gabriella.
To follow Gabriella's lead, allow me to offer my own perspective. Read on.
--- The Mirror Test ---
Take a look in a mirror, females. Do you like what you see, or do you think you can look/feel/become more beautiful than you are right now?I have learned to appreciate that everyone and [almost] everything in life are beautiful in their own respective ways. Most people think that someone who is flabby or unattractive just isn't beautiful or not considered to be beautiful (or have qualities deserving of being beautiful). When you are not confident in your own skin, you feel down and disappointed. You feel unloved and disregarded. You feel even more like looking and remaining beautiful is of the utmost importance.
--- Yes... You ARE Beautiful! ---
There are a number of situations where some people (let alone females) don't feel beautiful all the time. Allow me to offer some calming and encouraging words if you fall into any of these categories. To give you advanced warning- a few of these talking points are a bit awkward in their content matter in helping you feel beautiful/handsome, so be warned. My hope for these portions is to help people in certain categories who don't feel handsome/beautiful. I also hope this expands my reading audience somewhat.Each section may feature posts you may be interested in based on past blog posts of mine. These are old blog posts relevant to each section, so feel free to see these posts if you've never seen them before.
Lacking in the "Three B's."
There is what I often call the Three B's- belly, butt, and breasts. Some females don't have a beautiful midsection for when wearing a bikini or exposing midriff. Not every female has the backside that immediately draws attention from onlookers. Also, not every female has copious chest to feel totally sexy.Whereas most people would immediately write off and disregard such ladies that don't have such features that make them immensely sexy, many people just fail to realize that you don't need these things to feel sexy and attractive. Too many people focus entirely on these parts of the body to have sex appeal or feel beautiful. Even for a male like myself, I know what makes a girl attractive does not involve just these features. What makes one lady immensely appealing is confidence. Why confidence? Because confidence is sexy. A confident woman is a beautiful woman. Lack confidence, and you don't feel beautiful. So remain strong and be confident in yourself.
RELEVANT POSTS THAT MIGHT INTEREST YOU:
• Exposing Midriff - showing off your midriff
• Attention to Booty :) - a post about looking good from behind.
Plus Size Beauty.
One of the most popular blog posts on "John's Blog Space" is "Plus Size Fashion," which I discussed fashion for curvy females. The mindset for mainstream society is that curvy does not equal beautiful. Someone not as slim and as slender as a Barbie doll is not considered beautiful to most people in common culture. Such people feel that being overweight is not only unhealthy, but also unattractive. So you can imagine the sort of depression most plus size females feel when they feel shoved aside and disregarded because of their body size. For example, there are a lot of people who love the music of Adele, but many people (usually on YouTube) knock on her just because she's full-figured. It's almost as if people are being judged for their exterior more than who people are within.A certain blog in particular caught my interest and is purely relevant in helping the female audience become more confident in their looks. I came across one young lady after reading a blog post from "Principessa Gabriella" here on Blogger/Blogspot. This girl named Georgina Doull of "Cupcake's Clothes" is one who caught my interest. What makes "Cupcake's Clothes" a fun blog to visit is because of Georgina's playful and girly style. When I read the bio about her on her blog, Georgina talks about not being confident enough in her looks. Trust me- when you look at her blog and see her colorful sense of fashion, she is just a super-cute ray of sunshine.
As long as you feel confident and beautiful despite being full-figured, that's all that matters. I've come across many beautiful ladies online and away from the computer who are plus-sized. It's just sad that many people feel it is best to tease and disregard plus size females, calling them things like "fatty" or whatever. There are a number of beautiful curvy ladies out there ranging from Jordin Sparks to Nikki Blonsky and many others. Even if you are not any of the aforementioned ladies, you don't have to be any of them to be beautiful.
RELEVANT POSTS THAT MIGHT INTEREST YOU:
• Plus Size Fashion - my popular blog post highlighting on plus/extended/curvy fashion.
Petite Beauty.
There are some petites who don't feel beautiful since most fashions are catered towards more average-size, average-height women. I can tell you that petite women can be just as beautiful (if not more so) than most average-size women. One of my friends from Middle School is 4'8", and not only is she a good friend of mine, she is also very lovely. So don't let being vertically-challenged deter you. You are as beautiful as any average-size, average-height woman even if you are short. Or as some petites would say, "I'm not short; I'm fun-sized!" :)RELEVANT POSTS THAT MIGHT INTEREST YOU:
• Sweet Petite! - my blog post on petite fashion.
Mature Beauty.
I am talking here about women 35 years old or older who don't feel beautiful. Some older women tend to feel sad that they either (A) don't look as attractive as a slender High School girl or a young college girl, or (B) wished they could look as attractive as they did when they were younger. You can still be beautiful for your age. Some ladies 35 and older even wear youthful fashions from some of the same popular brands (like Hollister and bebe) and look every bit as cute as any teen girl or any college girl. This may sound a bit strange, but there are many women 35 or older (and even 50 or older) that are as beautiful, if not more so than most celebrities between the ages of 13 and 25. I consider 64-year old (as of September 15, 2011) Paula Deen to be beautiful as say... 21-year old (as of September 15, 2011) Taylor Swift.The one thing to remember is that you can still look and feel fabulous regardless of your age. In pop culture, the whole influence on cougars (single mothers who actively pursue much younger men) have helped to make most older women feel sexy and attractive. You are still beautiful even if you aren't a slender teenage girl. You are just more classy beautiful than anything overbearing and over-the-top.
Girls' Beauty.
Please note that this section regards helping children feel beautiful. If you have a little daughter or know a little girl who doesn't feel beautiful, it can be damaging psychologically down the road to her psyche and her self-confidence. I recall a Dove commercial where a little girl looks at a poster at a bus stop and doesn't feel beautiful. Thereafter, Dove talked about how they've set up workshops to help little girls feel confident and beautiful.A little girl should be feeling festive and cute rather than dislike herself for not being as beautiful as other girls. Peer pressure, more than anything, is surely a deciding factor in battling low self-esteem and in battling a lack of self-confidence. This is something little girls should not have to feel terrible about as such a young age. Parents and others will need to help such girls feel better about themselves and realizing they are beautiful.
I've tried to embed the video to this blog post, but embedding was disabled. So please click on this link to see the YouTube video I tried to make mention to: "Dove Commercial (Girls are under pressure)" on YouTube.
Now for a few awkward additions to help people feel beautiful.
Masculine Beauty.
My Fashion and Style blog posts are mostly suited towards my female viewers. However, there are some males who don't feel handsome in their looks and in their style. Not as many guys are as image-conscious as females are. There still can be a lot to be said to help out guys here. I am a male myself, so it's pretty awkward that a guy is offering other guys advice on being and feeling handsome.The most important thing to remember is to just be yourself. You don't have to be the dashing bloke who will reluctantly sweep any single lady off her feet. You only need two things: swagger and charm. As for looks, just dress well and look handsome. No girl wants a guy who is shy or has the sex appeal of a Toyota Prius. Even if you are not a hard-bodied hunk (I am not one at all), it all boils down to if you still feel handsome... even if nobody ever says you're handsome. I can attest to this myself. The only people whom have ever considered me handsome are my mother and a few of my female friends.
If you are an androgynous male, you still have to have plenty of charm and charisma. Dressing up nicely can help in this department along with being confident in your own skin and body. Just stay true to yourself and be as handsome as you like.
Transgender Beauty.
For those who are transvestites, transsexuals, or intersexed; there are a number of you who don't feel confident in your own skin. The problem most (especially) transgendered folk face is that they don't feel as beautiful as their genetic counterparts. An example would be a male who crossdresses as a female and doesn't feel beautiful while crossdressing. Such a transgendered person would probably doubt himself/herself because he/she doesn't look and feel as attractive as any genetic female/male. This can also pertain to the transsexual (regardless of pre-operative or post-operative) who still doesn't feel as charming as his/her new self.As much as I expressed having swagger and believing in yourself for males, this also pertains to transgendered or intersexed persons. You have to know and feel in your heart that you're beautiful. You can't be shy and passive- there has to be a certain level of charm you must exude to be and feel beautiful. Having that aura and that inviting charm will help you to be better and feel beautiful. If it helps, try going with clothing to make you feel more comfortable and look hot.
RELEVANT POSTS THAT MIGHT INTEREST YOU:
• Males Wearing Feminine Fashions - while not about crossdressing, it chronicles males wearing feminine fashions.
• Androgyny in Fashion and Art - the unique charm of androgynous fashion.
• Transgender - a massive blog post concerning various aspects of transgendered folk.
--- BelieveMeWhenISay.com ---
(ADDED: March 12, 2012)I was approached on YouTube by a YouTube channel recently. A YouTube channel named "mattyclum" introduced me to the "I Am Beautiful" campaign. Here is a video about beauty courtesy of "mattyclum." Have a look:
For more information, visit www.believemewhenisay.com.
Various external influences and pressures help us feel less than what we really are. We have to feel like we have to be like everybody else (or at least those who are considered beautiful/handsome). The fact that not all of us are equal makes us feel bad inside. You just have to block these things out and remember that you are as awesome as you want to be and feel. If it helps, try exercising to lose weight or any other sort of measures to help regain your confidence. Feeling beautiful again is different for many people, but it's doable. Always remember- YES! You ARE beautiful!
Thank you for reading!
2 comments:
Great post John, very inspirational! I agree, everyone is beautiful in their own special way. I love that Bruno Mars song too, it's so sweet! :)
♥ Check out my blog: Principessa
Gabriella
I love your posts, they are so informative and positive, I wish more people had your out look on things.
http://thewoollenmitten.blogspot.com/
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