Friday, May 20, 2011


John Marine | 5/20/2011 03:57:00 AM | | |
When tears fall from our eyes, they can be for any number of reasons- happy moments, powerful experiences, and of course... falling on hard times. I can honestly tell you from my own personal experiences, crying is a powerful release that helps you to feel better eventually. We sometimes need moments to let out our innermost feelings. There have been times where I have felt terrible inside and feel like no one is around to console me in my weakest times. This blog post is about crying, mostly in negative times.

Crying and Toughness.

And if you're someone who questions one's manhood because of a man crying, realize something- we are all human. I think a lot of us assume that crying is a weakness and that real people don't cry. So a male who breaks down into tears over something is often seen as not being a real man. Almost like we're supposed to be unbreakable and real. Using "real" can be a total misconception. What many people consider real is in being tough and being impervious to all the worries in the world. In reality, though, we all have certain breaking points. It doesn't make you a weak person just because you get to be too emotional about things.

Crying as a Release (Negative).

As a release in bad situations, it usually shows that someone needs some support to avoid completely breaking down. For people who need help, crying is often a sign that one is weak and can't support himself/herself to deal with whatever is bothering him/her. The person hopes to receive some support from someone available who is able to help that person. For people who are reacting over doing something they did wrong (like a cheating spouse/lover or a child who breaks something valuable), crying is a sign of admitting wrong and begging for forgiveness.

There are implied words behind tears. There are feelings behind tears. What they are and what we wish would change depends on the situation. Regardless, the best release is through tears.

Crying as a Release (Positive).

There was a time when a friend of mine was concerned that she was raising her children by herself and that she was all the children have. She was obviously very sad having to go it alone being a mother and probably in tears posting the message. In an effort to help encourage and make her feel better, I sent a message on Myspace to her. She replied saying that she was crying, but crying happy tears knowing that there are people who care and that value friendship.

These are obviously what we call "happy tears." It's when there are people who feel so relieved and so loved that a release of happiness is exuded from someone. I feel happy knowing that I've helped a friend or a respected one feel better about himself/herself through calming words and encouraging words.

Other happy times to cry are when we experience beautiful things, laugh to a hilarious joke or moment, or become so happy with someone that we just break down crying. These are just positive releases to positive moments.

Crying and Compassion.

Sometimes, we think about things and have certain emotions that just bring us down. We can't solve our own problems all the time. I think crying and seeking compassion from others helps us to better bond with others and to feel free. If certain people are TRULY committed to making others' lives better for the better, they try to work with people rather than leave them on their own to struggle in life.

Tears for Peers.

Because there are people whom I respect or feel have mattered so much to me, I feel compassionate and concerned for people who have their issues. There are genuine people I've read about who have issues of some kind. My emotions are for these genuine people to have better breaks in life than what many of them are concerned about. When there are people who you care about and who care about you, you often wish them the absolute best life has to offer. Depending on whatever issues they have, you begin to really feel sorry for someone, to the point of tears sometimes. Almost as if your tears are a request you are making to the heavens to assist in helping someone in need.

Is it Okay to Cry?

Absolutely! You obviously feel terrible when... you are in terrible situations and environments. Would you rather evoke emotions of wanting change or let these terrible moments take control of your life? Crying is very acceptable. You are only weak when you cry if other people see you as a sorry excuse for a human being. You know, people who don't know how you REALLY feel.

There were times a few days after Hurricane Ike when I became concerned that life would return to normal. I was growing impatient that life won't return to normal any sooner. I've cried a few tears to myself as I wrote a little journal about feeling so sad while power was out at my house and in my neighborhood. At times back in college, I felt like nobody loved me and that I would disappoint those who most believe in me (I HATE disappointing people I love or care about). So in these times, I've cried. And if you cry often or easily break into tears, it doesn't mean you are a pathetic person. It just means there are issues with you that requires you to find someone or something to help get you through your issues.

Crying is a healthy release whether for positive or negative reasons. Do not be afraid or fearful of crying- you might end up feeling better you've let out your emotions! We all need time often times to gather up our strength again after being so weak. For those of who are depressed, crying is really a sign that we can't seem to go through life positively on our own.

To anyone who may be having some personal problems and have cried over them, I really hope life gets better for you. I hope you will be able to have your problems solved sooner rather than much later. Do remember that crying is a positive release. Please take care and be safe. Thank you for reading.

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